Is it okay to have premarital sex if you know you are going to marry the person?
From a human perspective, it seems reasonable to think it is okay for a couple to have sex if they are going to be married soon anyway. However, God’s Word has a clear and direct command on this topic: “Marriage should be honored by all, and the marriage bed kept pure, for God will judge the adulterer and all the sexually immoral” (Hebrews 13:4). The “sexually immoral” in this verse includes all those who engage in sex outside of marriage. The world views fornication lightly, but not God.
Paul exhorts the Christians at Corinth, saying, “Now for the matters you wrote about: ‘It is good for a man not to have sexual relations with a woman.’ But since sexual immorality is occurring, each man should have sexual relations with his own wife, and each woman with her own husband” (1 Corinthians 7:1–2). His words will later encourage those who are able to live single and celibately in order to fully serve Christ (1 Corinthians 7:7–9, 25–40). Biblically, the only appropriate context for sexual relations is marriage. Those who are “going to get married” are, by definition, unmarried and should not be living as if they were married.
In Jewish culture, sexual relations were clearly restricted until marriage under the Law of Moses. Even though a betrothal was considered a binding agreement, sexual relations were still restricted until the actual marriage. The first time a man and woman had sexual relations together was considered the consummation of the marriage. These two acts—marriage and sexual intercourse—were so closely related as to be nearly synonymous. This explains in part why Jesus answered the Pharisees’ question about divorce by saying, “I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, and marries another woman commits adultery” (Matthew 19:9). In Jewish culture marriage and sexual relations were commonly spoken of together.
Paul elaborates on this idea in 1 Corinthians 6:12–20, in his discussion of God’s lordship over our bodies as well as our souls. He says that, when a man has sex with a prostitute, he has become “one with her in body” (verse 16). It’s clear that the sexual relationship, no matter the context, is special. There is a level of vulnerability one experiences in a sexual relationship that God wants kept within a committed, trusting marital union. Even if you think you are going to marry the person, it is important to honor one another by waiting until you are actually married before giving yourselves to one another sexually.
Simply having marriage plans for the future does not give anyone the right to disobey God’s clear commands in Scripture. If you are planning to get married, congratulations. But, in your planning, honor God and honor your future spouse. Premarital sex is a temptation for every engaged or dating couple, requiring precautions and a commitment to walk in the Spirit. Think about your wedding plans. Think about God’s goodness to you as a couple. But “do not think about how to gratify the desires of the flesh” (Romans 13:14).
For those who have engaged in premarital sex, there is hope and forgiveness in Christ. If we confess our sin, He will forgive and cleanse us from “all unrighteousness” (1 John 1:9). A new path of purity can begin today, with a renewed commitment to living sexually pure until marriage, despite one’s past. As Paul wrote, “One thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus” (Philippians 3:13–14).
Good morning, I will like if you can please answer this question for more enlightenment..
ReplyDeleteCan someone obey is pastor or spiritual father prophecy that once should be joined together before paying doury
Example... A brother and a sister slept with each other which result to pregnancy now the lady in had miscarriage and after pastor much concealing that God is not happy with such incident,the pastor or the prophet says he hear that the lady and the guy should be joined together and as a spiritual mentor the beloved agree as it is the voice of God even when the parents of both have not agree with them to marry talkless of paying the be necessarily things..
Bless you
Thanks for the comments I'm impressed.
DeleteBy God's grace I will provide the answer according to the word of God.
Stay tuned.
What was the purpose of a dowry (Genesis 31:15)?
DeleteA dowry, sometimes called a bride price or bridewealth, was a payment made by a man as a gift to the family of a woman he desired to be his wife. In Genesis 29, Jacob loved Rachel and offered to work seven years for her father, Laban, in exchange for her hand in marriage. This is one example of the ancient convention of the dowry.
In Jacob’s day, giving a dowry for Rachel was the expected cultural practice. Arranging to work off a dowry was an accepted practice as well. One scholar notes, "Regarding marriage generally, the Nuzi tablets provided that if a man worked over a period of time for the father of a girl whom he wished to marry, then he would have the right to take the girl as his wife” (Stuard A. West, “The Nuzi Tablets,” Bible and Spade 10:3–4, Summer–Autumn 1981, p. 70).
Since Jacob had no other major source of income at that time, he offered to work in exchange for Rachel as his wife. He understood it was the only offer he could make that would have appealed to Laban. Scholars note that laborers in the ancient Near East generally earned between one-half shekel and one shekel per month. Laban would likely have seen an offer of seven years of free labor as very generous. Jacob wanted to make his offer appealing to ensure Laban said “yes” to giving Rachel in marriage.
Jacob was deceived by Laban and first given Rachel’s sister, Leah, as a wife. In order to marry Rachel, Jacob had to agree to another seven years of labor. When the time finally came for Jacob and his family to leave Laban’s house, Leah and Rachel said, “Is there any portion or inheritance left to us in our father's house? . . . For he has sold us, and he has indeed devoured our money” (Genesis 31:14-15). Jacob’s years of work in exchange for Rachel was clearly seen by these women as a form of income for Laban—income that he had spent, leaving his daughters no inheritance.
Still today, the dowry system is used in some parts of the world, especially in India, Bangladesh, Pakistan, Sri Lanka, and Nepal. The process requires the involvement of both families and a deep commitment by the potential husband before marriage. In Western nations, a different tradition has developed that involves asking a woman’s parents for her hand in marriage. Also somewhat confusing is that, today, a dowry is often regarded as money or other goods that a woman brings to the marriage rather than what the man gives.
The dowry system is a long-standing practice in Eastern culture that is still in use today. The benefits include a closer connection between both families and assurance of the man’s commitment to the union. The disadvantages include the lack of money serving as a barrier to one’s ability to marry.
The parents are the foundation of the marriage therefore those beloved has been mislead by the spiritual leader or pastor.
We have to be very careful with this prophecy of a thing .... May God have mercy on us.... There are many wolves in cloth sheeps
ReplyDeleteI pray we will not be more mislead in Jesus name